1) I'm looking for a steam-punk model for a portrait. Do you have a killer costume that needs a killer portrait? Are you near philly? Drop me a line.
2) I'm currently writing a play about a person who can speak to the dead -- unfortunately, it's only dead accountiants. Which is even less useful than you think, because most of them don't speak english. So I need some phrases in perfect French and Chineese (M or C doesn't matter) -- please hold off on offering suggestions unless you're a native speaker -- my own college 3 french is good enough to get it just wrong enough that it'll sound weird and get fruit thrown at the actors:
1) You cannot deduct the apartment you keep for your mistress. It is not a business expense.
2) That proforma is too good to be true.
3) This is an extremely low yeild investment.
4) Who is managing this portfolio? A rodeo clown?
5) I am currently under investigation.
6) It was a misplaced decimal point.
7) You will undoubtedly lose your house.
Pick and choose, I'm probably only going to use one in Chineese and Maybe four or five in French. It doesn't really matter what they are.
Thanks! Here's Roswell: